While talking to one of my friends at work, she mentioned a change in her relationship with her bestie. My friend is single, with no kids. Her bestie is a married mommy. *cue the drama*
There are usually some changes when one friend has a life change like marriage and babies. Things certainly changed for me. Some of my friendships drifted apart but there were never any hard feelings. I think we all just quietly acknowledged that things had changed.
In the situation of my work buddy there were some things said that caused her feelings to be hurt. Basically she was talking with her best friend and the obvious life differences came up. Her friend told her that it “must be nice to sleep in and not have to get up in the morning. You can do that, you don’t have responsibilities.” I think it was the way she said it that caused my friend to feel a little rained on.
As we talked about the encounter she’d asked me if I said things like that to my friends. (I don’t think I have) She also wondered why she was being dumped on when her friend had chosen to be married and chosen to have a child. She argued that how she lives her life is no less important or meaningful just because she’s single.
Our conversation got me wondering about how we treat our single friends after we say “I do”. Do we really forget what it was like to be single? Is it fair to dump on your friends because our lives have changed so much?