Before I became a mom it was all I heard. The talk of the back burner being the place where my dreams would reside. Once I became a mom it was as if it were a given that the dreamer side of me would take some sort of hiatus. Well, you should know now. There’s this thing about me. I like to do the things people say I can’t. So while everyone told me to be ready to put my life on hold, it only made me more determined to do the opposite.

I have still gone for my dreams with gusto. I just adjust my timeline a bit for my babies. While I’m OK with things taking a bit longer it doesn’t mean that those things are on the back burner. Working on my passions and dreams is something I do everyday. Instead of checking ten things off the list though, I am happy with checking off two. I don’t believe we stop living once we become mothers. We are more than our titles. Feeling like you need to reach some goal before you can do what you love is just a set back. “Once the kids graduate high school” is a long time. It’s possible to balance your hearts desires with being a fab mom. {tweet this}

lifelive CameshaThere’s a man my husband worked with. He and his wife recently visited Paris. He knew my husband and I had gone there and sparked a conversation with him about it. Comparing notes on things they’d seen and places they’d gone. He told my husband he didn’t enjoy it as much as he thought he would have. He wasn’t up for all the walking and general moving around that’s involved with seeing the sights. He said he’d regretted that he and his wife hadn’t gone when they were younger. They had put off so much of what they wanted to do until the kids were older. They’d saved a nice amount of money to do all of these things that they were now too tired to do. He said from that experience he had decided to encourage his kids to not focus so much on the money and to live now.

It’s a beautiful thing to experience the beauty of the Eiffel Tower. It’s quite different when you’re 30 vs 60. All the stairs to get to the top of the tower may not be as appealing. The same goes for any business or passion you want to pursue. The older we get, it’s less appealing to put in the work to make those things happen.

Everywhere I go, I hear moms talk about all the things they want to do. The business they want to start the things they’d like to try. Almost always the dreams begin with the words “when the kids are older, I’ll…” The thing about the future… it’s not here yet. It may never get here. That ideal life you’ve planned for when the kids are older. Why not live it now?

What are you putting off until the kids get older?

88 comments on “When The Kids Are Older, I’ll…”

  1. Now that my son is 18 I have started doing things for myself. I went on a girls cruise with my girlfriend’s last year. We left the husbands and kids at home. I wish I had done stuff like that when my son was younger. They survived just fine without me.

  2. This is a very interesting post that truly hits home. There is one thing that I truly have the desire to do before my kids are old (this is sad) but I want a private dinner for just my husband and I. Because he’s so attached to the kids, that has not happened in eight years. What must a wife do to have a date (lol) with hubby?

  3. Now that my hubby and I have a family, it is no longer just what the 2 of us want to do but what we can do in the future with our KIDS! We can’t wait to take them to Atlantis where we honeymooned but we have to wait until they are TALL enough, not old enough, to ensure they can ride all the slides. Great post 🙂

  4. Girl say that please! I dont have kids but I am watching mostly all of my friends with kids complain about what they can’t do because of kids. Ive also watch my mother not reach for her dreams after my brother and me were born (to her defense my brother was diagnosised with autism) but we are all adults and yet she still has excuses. I will NEVER blame my kids or put my dream on hold because I am a mother. I dont think that is fair nor do I think any children would want their mother to not be able to have dreams too to have them. Its all a mindset and Mamas are out there doing it bigger and better than ever.

    This isnt the 50s we dont have excuses anymore!
    Kiwi recently posted…{Recap} Macys The Soul Era Black History Atlanta ft. June AmbroseMy Profile

  5. Sleep, travel, vacation and pee alone! Haha. I don’t know in all honesty but I’m looking forward to spending time with my hubby and any grand babies we may get! And time with my adult kids:)

  6. Wow I really haven’t thought about this. I guess with my youngest not even 3 yet and we don’t know if we will have more babies I haven’t even thought about the “after kids” life. Maybe travel the world?

  7. We’re putting off a trip to Cambodia until the youngest one is older. We want to see Angkor Wat and there’s a lot of climbing in the elements and heat… probably better suited for him when he’s a wee bit bigger (he’s 7 now). 🙂 I agree though… living life now is a wonderful message to share.angkor

  8. We’re like you, we don’t put anything off. I find it might be harder to do things when they are more dependent on you, but I push forward anyway. We include them in our lives professionally and personally so they view us as a positive role model and witness our habits, etc. Lead by example!

    jessica
    http://teamwiking.com
    Jessica Doll recently posted…Week 6, Be MineMy Profile

  9. I love this!! I didn’t really start going for my dreams until I had my children. I don’t know why I waited, I had a lot of time on my hands prior to them. I guess it just wasn’t my time… it shows my children that life is a balancing act and that you can reach your dreams and still attend the games and special school programs and work on the big projects at home. At the same damn time.
    Michellette “Mimi” Green recently posted…DIY Chocolate Drizzled PopcornMy Profile

  10. I am looking forward to travelling when the kids have moved out. I have a son finishing his first year of College and a daughter starting College next year. My travelling days are in sight.

  11. I was fortunate to have lived a life traveling with both of my parents working in the travel and hospitality industry growing up. I used to jump on planes every weekend. I even studied abroad in Europe and in Central America. I am glad I got to do all that before I was married and had kids, because it has slowed down. Although now I get to plan for my kids to have those same wonderful experiences. I like to get away with just my husband sometimes too.
    Tonia @TheChattyMomma recently posted…New Year, New View – A Look at Learning to Eat HealthyMy Profile

  12. I have learned that my children are motivated by seeing me pursue my dreams. There’s no greater pursuit than to allow them to be a part of your journey to getting “there.” Wherever your there is. Beautiful post.

  13. I put off going back to work until my son graduated high school. Now that he’s about to graduate, I’m not sure I’ll be going back to work at all…

    • Adjusting my timeline is the only thing that works for me. I can’t have the same expectations I put on myself before. There are more people in the equation now. 🙂

  14. As selfish as this sounds, I have always thought about ME! I grew up with a mother who took care of yourself (i.e., went to the gym), worked full time, and enjoyed her life with her friends. At no point did I feel unwanted or unloved nor did I even notice that my mom was being ‘selfish!!!’ My motto is a happy mom is a good mom!

  15. I feel like I’m the opposite of everyone lol…. I have no problem traveling with my princess…. Her first flight she was only one month old! All she knows is travel so she loves it and is well behaved etc….I also live a life where hubby and I have no help with people willing to babysit…. So screw them I will do it all and they can watch 😉 nothing stopping us!

  16. Maybe because I grew up with traveling parents, I traveled with my kids when they were little. You just figure out what you need to calm then; books, toys, etc, and off you go.

  17. This is such a great post! I think it’s definitely important to continue to follow your dream while your kids are still young – even though it might be difficult. I’ve been putting off going back to university and getting more education until they’re older but I might want to start thinking of ways to do this while my son is still young.
    Michelle @ Dishes and Dust Bunnies recently posted…Try this Awesome Double Chocolate Banana Bread RecipeMy Profile

  18. Girl this post hit home. I am constantly dreaming about when my kids are older. I have things I’m working on now but if I’m honest I don’t give them as much time as I could. Thank you for this motivation!!!

  19. Fantastic post Camesha! Like you, I slowed down but didn’t put the dreams on the backburner. I wanted my kids to see that you’re never too old to learn and grow. Sure wish I had you to inspire me during those early years though! You doing great work!!
    April recently posted…4 Emotions We Love to HateMy Profile

  20. I do and don’t put things off. I’m not going to take my three kiddos to trek through Peru for a few weeks because they’re too young to enjoy it and I really want it to be a trip for the husband and me… LOL. I’m selfishly saving that for when the kids are older. But I do chase my dreams and take them on that journey with me. I work from home and I’m truly passionate about what I do. It’s helped them see that sometimes your dreams can be a bit outside the box. And hard work is always worth it for your calling!
    Erin recently posted…time for a change {a review}My Profile

  21. Fantastic post! We put off so much of what makes life worth living to “someday” when the kids are older, when we retire, when we save enough money, when we… fill in the blank. I call it “The Procrastination of Pleasure” and is one of the main reasons why I started my blog with my mission to #MakeSomedayHappen. Cheers to you for sharing this message. It is a great example for parents to give their children. To show it’s important to make our dreams, whatever they may be, a trip or a business, happen today for someday may never come.
    Christina Thomas recently posted…Roux Tampa is Worth the Drive {Review & Photos}My Profile

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