By now you know, back in June my family relocated. We moved from the Los Angeles area to Orange County. We are now about 40 miles away from L.A. When we decided that we were going to make this change I was a mix of excited and nervous.

Why is it so easy to forget about yourself as a mom? Recently, a friend called me on it. I totally forgot about me and had to cop to it and then fix it.

I was excited to move.

We had been feeling like we could use a bit more space. Truth be told, we were looking forward to having a true backyard for the kids and the dog. We had a patio area and they had outgrown that. I was also looking forward to a dedicated office space for me. Those are the things I was excited about.

My nerves were bad

I was nervous about what to expect in a county where only 2 percent of the people look like my family. I was nervous about being farther away from my friends. Moving away from Los Angeles was big for me too. What if I wanted to go back to my career in the entertainment industry? How would that even be possible? Still with all my concerns the biggest focus for me has been my kids. I have been very intentional about making sure they transition as seamlessly as possible. Soon after we moved in, I found things to get them involved in our new community. We took some time to adjust to the new house and neighborhood and then it was off to summer day camps and swimming classes.

I forgot about me

What I didn’t realize is that I hadn’t spent nearly enough time on myself. It took my friend calling me on it for me to acknowledge it. She reminded me that it wasn’t only important that I focus on how the kids transition but that I needed to think about myself as well. Then she stressed that I didn’t just move to a new neighborhood but that I had essentially moved my whole life to a new city and that I needed to take time and absorb that. She was right.

I forgot about me in the process. I think I pushed it to the back of my mind because in the past I’ve always been able to adjust pretty easily. Still, she was right. I make sure the kids have time at the parks in our neighborhood, the day camps, the activities at the library and any thing else they might enjoy. What about me? I sat down and thought about how I really feel about this move and what I could do to give myself a smooth transition.

New beginnings

Part of the transition is the excitement of new beginnings. I could see what that looked like for my husband and our kids and now I was taking some time to see what that looks like for me. In many ways, I just got some much needed breathing room. My husband and kids are closer to home for school and work. I walk our kids to their new school that’s literally two streets over. My husband is 15 minutes away from home instead of nearly two hours. That means more family time, dinner together and more writing time for me. Maybe I’ll have time to actually do many of the things that have been swirling around my head. Whoot!

Making a plan

I got to thinking and my old self kicked in. When I would wind up in new situations, I joined stuff. I found groups around my interests and joined. I went to meet ups and connected with people. That’s always been a part of how I settle into a new place or situation. So, I went on a search for things that interest me. I found plenty!

I found a few meet up groups and one Facebook group. One is called Girls with Goals and it’s all about motivating women to reach our dreams. Does that mission sound familiar? Yes, please! I’m also signed up for a jewelry class that I started last week. I have been wanting to do this forever. It was on my 40 before 40 list and I’m 40, so I need to get on it! I’m using this move as motivation to push myself further and look for ways to grow.

These are the small ways I’m acting on that motivation. What motivates you to and helps you to keep growing?

13 comments on “From LA to OC: I forgot about me”

  1. Sounds like you guys are adjusting to your new home and community. It’s cool that you guys have more time to spend with one another. Glad that you found something thatyou wanted to do. Jewelry making is prettt cool.

  2. I’m from Los Angeles and I know moving to Orange County can be a big adjustment. I think as a mother and wife it is always hard to think about yourself. I’m glad you friend pointed out that you need self care as always. Jewelry making class and FB groups are an awesome way to meet new people.

  3. We all need friends that can call us out in a loving way and good thing she did! Glad your family is adjusting well and now you have found a way to help you adjust as well. As a mom, we often lose ourselves making sure everyone else is taken care of! This actually opened my eyes to some stuff I need to get done

  4. As moms we always tend to forget about ourselves. I’m guilty of it all the time and my husband always has to remind me that I need to take care of myself too. Thanks for sharing this with us!

  5. GIrl I so understand this feeling. I know I need to do better for myself so that I can take care of my kids and they can be happy and thrive.

  6. Your idea of “I forgot about me” reminds me of when I first got married. I was so focused on being a good wife to my husband that I forgot about being good to myself as well, which didn’t make the start of our marriage easy. Once I learned to cater to the needs of my husband and myself our marriage was much happier and still is.

  7. When you are making moves for your family, it is easy for women to forget about themselves. I do it all the time. What is important is that you never forget to come back to yourself.

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